How Will You Cope? 2007-07-22

CLOates
22 July 2007
Norman, Okla., USA

How Will You Cope?

A few years ago near the end of my brother's final illness, an event sensitized me to the issue of physicians and nurses caring for patients and their families without becoming debilitated themselves in the process. My brother had been in the hospital for about a week with multiple systems failing--congestive heart failure, septicemia, and the list went on and on--when his physician team determined that there was nothing more they could usefully do for him. It was time to transfer him from hospital to hospice. Very reluctantly, my mom and I agreed, and soon my brother was being prepared for transfer to the hospice facility across town.

Since my brother had been extraordinarily well cared for over the preceding week, I approached two of his nurses as we were leaving the Intensive Care Unit to thank them and ask them to pass along thanks to the other staff who had been very caring and particularly gracious with a sometimes-difficult patient. A couple of sentences into my thank-you, I was overcome by emotion and was unable to speak further. Seeing my plight, one of the nurses stepped forward and gave me a hug whose intensity and duration surprised me a bit. It was more what I would have expected from my daughter than from someone I had known a few days, even a few days in very difficult circumstances. I really needed a hug then, and it was very much appreciated, but it set me to wondering how the nurse would be able to doff her stethoscope at the end of the day and go on about her life. Could she sympathize, even empathize, with a patient's family at the level she obviously did and not be adversely affected herself?

I don't know the answer to that question, and I certainly don't claim any expertise beyond a bit of insight that comes from too often being a family member of a terminally ill patient. I bring the issue up because many of my students will face the question, probably sooner rather than later, in their nursing or other health-related careers. I'll have more to say about this topic in the coming days, though probably it'll be more questions than answers. Your comments are most assuredly welcomed.

Two Messages, 2007-07-14

CLOates
14 July 2007
Norman, OK 73072, USA

The two items below came to me in e-mail messages in the last few days. The first, "Going Fishing," reproduced here by permission, is a very different kind of fish story by my student Susan Porter, a writer for the Guthrie News Leader, from the 29 June 2007 issue of the GNL. I suppose my personal version of it would have slightly different events. Perhaps I'd have caught a whole school of marlin, but missed the sign that said, "Anyone catching marlin must divest themselves of all income sources." :^)

The second, "A Newborn's Conversation with God," is from my student Lauryn, who'll be a mom very soon. She and her software engineer husband have recently moved to Pennsylvania to take a new job upon leaving the Air Force. Caution: if you're a parent, or maybe even if you're not, this one is rated at three or four tissues.

Enjoy!

____________________________________________________________

GOING FISHING

BY SUSAN PORTER

Recently, I had the opportunity to go fishing in the ocean. I love to fish! I don't consider myself a skilled fisherman, but from my childhood experiences, Dad taught me how to "feel" the fish on the end of the line--and I've caught my share of fish. And fishing is exciting because, in the ocean, you never know what kind of fish you might pull up. Additionally, the ocean is different than the little ponds I grew up fishing in because the waves pull at your fishing line and sometimes it is hard to feel when the fish is actually taking the bait.

Once on the pier, I cast my line far into the water. I looked around at the numerous fishermen to either side of me. Everyone stood silent----looking out toward the ocean---somehow mesmerized by the dancing white waves.

After reeling my line in several times, I finally "felt" the rhythm of the wind and large waves.(The man beside me gently suggested I leave my line in the water long enough for a fish to notice the bait on it). Minutes later, I felt something on my line---I tugged hard. To my surprise---something BIG was on my line. I tried to reel, but the line continued to slip and the tip of my pole was making a serious bend toward the water. At this point, several of the fishermen began to congregate around me and I asked for assistance from the man beside me. After several minutes, my great catch was brought onto the pier---but it was not the "great fish" I had envisioned. Instead, it was a large stingray, about the size of a small car tire! I just stood there as a fellow fisherman removed the hook from the mouth of the stingray, and placed it back into the water.

Isn't life like that sometimes? Just about the time we think we are doing things according to the rules--or as planned -------something unexpected happens. There we are---minding our own business------fishing in this great ocean of life------seeking those things that will bring us wealth....success....happiness-----and just about the time we think we have found it-----we have to go through financial loss, failing health, or the breakup of a relationship.

Fortunately, we don't have to deal with "life" alone. We have a heavenly Father who knows our struggles---even our disappointments. He understands them all. And yes, I believe God gives us the desire to keep going--to not give up; to keep putting the fishing line back into the water----However, God may also want us to realize that all those things we may be "fishing" for, are not capable of bringing us the true happiness we think they will.

____________________________________________________________

"A Newborn's Conversation with God" (source uncertain)

A baby asked God, "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow,
but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"

God said,"Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you."

The child further inquired, "But tell me, here in heaven I don't have
to do anything but sing and smile to be happy."

God said, "Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you.
And you will feel your angel's love and be very happy."

Again the child asked, " And how am I going to be able to understand
when people talk to me if I don't know the language?"

God said, "Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words
you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will
teach you how to speak."

"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"

God said, "Your angel will place your hands together and will teach
you how to pray."

"Who will protect me?"

God said, "Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its
life."

"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."

God said, "Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach
you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to
you."

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, "God, if I am to leave
now, please tell me my angel's name."

God said,"You will simply call her 'Mom.'"

More and More, 2007-07-13

More and More

An engineer is a person who knows more and more about less and less until, in the limit, (s)he finally knows everything about nothing.

A salesperson is one who knows less and less about more and more until finally (s)he knows nothing about everything.

A purchasing agent is a person who, through association with engineers and salespeople, winds up knowing nothing about anything!

--Unknown, but not original with me.

Since Everyone Else Is Talking About It, 2007-07-13

CLOates
13 July 2007
Norman, Oklahoma 73072, USA

Since Everyone Else Is Talking About It

One of my Math for Health Careers students completed the course early (today, in fact) so that he could leave for advanced infantry training, to be followed shortly by a deployment to Iraq. He earned a better grade than he had expected. Both he and I were certainly happy about that, but having the war hit somewhat closer to home than it has before, at least to my knowledge, has prompted me to make a few observations.

0) Thank goodness, the conduct of most of the American military in Iraq and Arabia generally, has been exemplary. With several unfortunate, glaring exceptions (for which responsible upper echelon leaders have NOT been punished), our soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen have carried out their duties in the manner that Americans had came to expect of their military before the Viet Nam fiasco.

1) By now, many Americans seem to have realized that it would have been better NOT to have invaded Iraq. George H. W. Bush was considerably wiser than his son on this issue. (Even if history finally grants that H.W. stopped the first Gulf War too soon, that error was mild, indeed, when compared with the strategy of W. and his hawkish coterie who have now involved us--"preemptively," no less--in a war that is highly unlikely ever to be stopped, much less won, on its current terms.)

2) One wonders where the Loyal Opposition was when the idea of invading Iraq, a country that almost certainly had little to do with the 9-11 massacre, was being sold to the American people in the first place. Breast-beating Democrats, where were you?

3) Unfortunately, it is not possible to turn back the clock and undo what's been done. It's necessary to figure out how to make the best of the current very bad situation.

4) For once, I can actually agree with George W. on one thing: to "cut and run" at this moment would be a disaster of very considerable proportions. Our credibility as a reliable partner and ally in international affairs, hardly a sparkling jewel currently, would be degraded to the point of non-existence.

5) To continue the war in its current mode is untenable. Saddam's Sunni brethren can, in all likelihood, maintain the current state of chaos for years, if not decades. That is to say, we are not likely ever to win a war to put in place an equitable, three-part government (Sunni, Shiite, and Kurd) in Iraq. One editorial writer, whose name I am now unable to remember, described this condition as being unable to "win clean."

6) That editorial writer's proposed solution was to "win dirty." By this he meant that we should set as our goal the establishment of an America-friendly government composed of the only Iraqi factions that are likely to cooperate in such a venture: the Iraqi Shiites and the Kurds. Under this strategy, our military attentions would be turned to systematically and deliberately defeating the Sunni faction, without regard to any thought of eventually bringing that faction into an Iraqi government. His argument was that, since the Sunnis are a 40% minority in Iraq, they are not going to be in power in any true democratic republic that might be established there. If the best we can get is a friendly government of Shiites and Kurds, we should do what it takes to establish that less-than-optimal, but perhaps workable, solution.

7) I'm not sure I believe that 6) above will actually be achievable, either; however, it's high time to put a strategy in place that will stanch the sacrifice of lives and treasure that endless war brings and do it, one hopes, without another "VietNam-ization" withdrawal. What is Plan B and when will we implement it? Or will we continue to act "on principles"-- principles that evidently have no contact with or feedback from reality? Ask the "principled" folks who gave us Prohibition about that one!

Does anyone have better ideas? I'm all ears.

HTML Tags, 2007-07-13

HTML Tags
Category: Blogging

If you'd like to play with HyperText Markup Language (HTML) tags in your

profile

blog

comments

and so on ...

there's a dandy little HTML reference at this location.

Enjoy!

Pioneer Article About Sue, 2007-07-13

CLOates
13 July 2007
Norman, OK 73072, USA

Pioneer Article About Sue

OCCC's Pioneer weekly newspaper published a much-appreciated article about Sue in its 9 July 2007 issue. It's available for viewing here:

http://www.okc.cc.ok.us/pioneer/Archives/July_9_2007/news9.html.

Thanks go to News Writing student Elliot Jones for an excellent article produced from his first-ever interview.

Blog Moved, 2007-03-24

24 Mar 07 Saturday 23:53

Blog Archive & Scrapbook at www.ChuckOates.com under Personal Items, Last Revised: 1-Apr-2007 My Blog Archive and Scrapbook now reside on my website at www.ChuckOates.com ; click on the link under Personal Items. Scrapbook last revised on Sunday, 25-March-2007 Blog Archive last revised on Sunday 1-April-2007. (The newer blog posts are now on MySpace, above. Some recently deleted blog postings do not yet appear in the archive--it IS the last two weeks of the semester!)